Message to JInG0 if u read this =): Cheer up :D:D:D Don't be mad and use all your energy to love me instead! =)

*smoochhhh...*

ok j/k :D *wipes the saliva off my lips. * *oops j/k)


Emotional Status: Normal, calm
(this is a very rare emotion to appear here, though it's called 'Normal'?)
Aural Status: LIstening to Savage Garden's Affirmation Track 2 (Track 12 VELLY nice. dunno where got sell this cd ahz.)

hello bloggeeee... sorry long time no see ah. kind of busy this week because I'm volunteering at this place called Ci2 Ji4 (in Chinatown). (background info: my dad's clinic is near this place, and he knows some person-in-charge there, so he helped me arrange this.) The first day (this tues) was pretty bad... 9 to 5 helping out in a kitchen to mould (or watever) some cookies. Constantly inhaling the smell of butter and milk was kinda nauesating, and I was pretty tired out. But the days after that were much better, actually kind of fun lah. ended up packing the cookies and getting kinda good at it too. better than being stuck in my housie, ending up so-slacko-that-i-don't-even-feel-like-slacking and too lazy to do practically everything and anything...

sad tt there weren't anybody my age there. (unless u can count a bunch of SMU ppl). but i din wanna ask anybody along cos this thing isn't exactly very fun. (But wait, Hey, anybody really interested here??) oh well. but the other ppl helping out there are nice leh. from wat i hear from them, i think some of them really has faith... which isn't that surprising, since most of them (maybe even all) are devout Buddhists. (background info: this place is built by a Buddhist organisation from taiwan. my dad says this is one of the largest voluntary organisations there, but i've nv heard of it... dunno* the head of da organisation is a Buddhist nun or some master. i think they do stuff like building old folks home and sending ppl to help in places where there's natural disaster or something.)

Sometimes I wonder, how many adults in our world really has faith... if kids (as in teens) don't have faith I guess it's kinda acceptable, since we're still coming to terms with the world. But to put it in plain words, in my opinion an adult without any faith is a failure. boohoo... By faith I don't mean a religion... just... something like... everybody's own way of coming terms with him/herself And the world And the way things are And things like love n evil n ?! but I guess it has to be positive, cos Osama's idea of faith probably isn't the same as mine. Though, maybe, the truth is that we all start with faith, but we lose them as we grow up, as we see more n more of this world and of human nature...

My dad's watching either Black Hawk Down or some other soldier movie. Don't like watching stuff like that. (which is why i'm not glued to da tayvee now) this kind of war stuff is just too sad, no matter wat the storyline, the word 'war' is gives me the impression of ... dumb. pathetic. stupid. shallow. violent. sad. But war is a human creation (i treat kinda human war dif. from animals fighting over a piece of meat) so it reflects everything humans are. sometimes i think humans are totally brillant. i mean, we're like... miracles. yea, homo sapiens are miracles. but it's a tragic miracle. because besides being brillant we are also dumb/pathetic/stupid/shallow/evil in some way or another/violent/ i do not know wat. at least most of us are, maybe those ppl who REALLY have A Lot of faith can raise above all evil/dumb stuff by the power of love (i'm sure there are these ppl around...), but personally I don't feel that there are a lot of them. definitely not enough anyway. at the moment I'd demand 6 billion of them.

Anyway... somehow I find the ... brotherhood between fellow soldiers a little... i don't know. I do think that this kind of... love/friendship/brotherhood(?) is powerful and strong but i feel like there's something... negative about it. I'm not too sure myself... so eh. don't waste brainpower lah huh.

okok i'll sign off here ;)